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Your Choice of Music
June 10, 2021
Your Choice of Music
Every funeral involves music to some degree, whether it be in the church or chapel or crematorium or at the graveside. Music provides a common thread, a shared opportunity for mourners to come together as one in celebration and remembrance of the deceased. Families choose every kind of music imaginable, whether it be their loved one’s personal favourites, pieces which remind others of them or ones of particular spiritual significance. There are no wrong choices, only the pieces which are right for this very personal, unique occasion.
The lack of singing together has been one of the saddest and most poignant consequences of the COVID era and the return of that communal commemoration is to be greatly welcomed. At the funeral service our advice would be that strong musical accompaniment, whether from a good quality recording or live musicians, is the best means to ensure members of the congregation feel genuinely involved and take a full part in proceedings. It can be sombre or uplifting or both, but music will bring people together.
In the case of burials, once the minister or other celebrant has finished the committal, cemetery staff will do the manual labour of filling the grave and tidying it sufficiently for family members to arrange the various floral tributes. Especially in winter, if the ground is particularly hard this can take up to an hour, and it is usual to fill that void in time with music. Integrity Funeral Care will be happy to sustain mourners with a hot cup of tea or coffee on request, but this is also a time when music is of vital importance. Family members may decide to bring their own instruments to play (guitars, tambourines and drums are all commonly used) or they might prefer to play tracks from an online source through a Bluetooth speaker. Certainly, some amplification can be very helpful in terms of keeping tune and time among the congregants. Equally, if there are one or two strong and confident singers among you, asking them to lead will encourage those more reluctant to fully join in. You might ask someone to track the verses, speaking each line before it is sung to make sure everyone sings the same words.
Some cherished hymns are chosen over and again; for example, Sleep on Beloved, Amazing Grace and Shall we Gather at the River are extremely popular. Not everyone chooses religious music and the strains of Bob Marley and Anita Baker are also very frequent choices.
As with every other detail of your farewell to a loved one, we are delighted to offer advice and support on any aspect of your musical decisions. We also have a hymn sheet of some of the most popular religious works available on request. Please ask for more details.
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